girl crushes

Sexuality is confusing. Like, sometimes I think I'm bisexual cos well, boobs. And girls in general are pretty attractive. But maybe I'm just straight but with wiggly crossover bits.

But I don't have any.... relationship aspirations for girls. I only had a crush on a single one and that still confuses the heck out of me. Personally, I think it's more likely that I just suffer from a very Jenna Marbles 'girl crush' syndrome.

I spend way more time looking at hot girls on Tumblr than I'd like to admit. Do I have pictures of half naked fit girls on my wall? Yes. But I'm just gonna quote. "I can't tell if I wanna be you, or be on you! Can I just fucking stare at you until I figure it out?"

To be fair, I look at hot men a lot too. I spent hours today in the Misha Collins tag on Tumblr and am not ashamed that I looked up 'Misha Collins naked' on Google. I just look at hot people a lot. Mia told a friend of mine the other day after the girl was like '....um, do you do this a lot?' when we were agreeing on the hotness of a guy that just walked past us. And she said 'well yeah. Lucy does this more than me, but basically we just look at everyone we see and assess them on how much we want to bang them.'

I do this way too much. I need to stop. I do this to almost everyone I see. Like, in crowds I do this. When I'm walking at uni I do this. It's a fucking good thing I have a best friend that doesn't find this creepy and understands my weird 'oi, hot guy at 9'o'clock' eyebrow wiggle. Not that we usualy agree on whether they're hot or not. I like guys with wide shoulders and fair colouring, very wholesome quarterback type. She's more 'tall, dark and handsome', which doesn't really appeal much to me. They tend to dress more metro and pay more attention to their hair. We have two of these guys in a shared tute. We gave them nicknames.

Is it objectifying? Well, yeah but I don't think that's wrong. Everyone is constantly judging the heck out of each other. Aesthetics please me. Like looking at pretty flowers but with hormones involved.

The amount of these people I'm gonna bang is regretfully low, so that's not even the point.

I don't even know what is the point, apart from pure admiration.

Overall, the point of this post was the decide that I'm probably not bisexual, I'm just pretty accepting of the fact that girls are hot.

Yep.

Edit: I think I've mainly put away the idea that I'm bisexual. Bicurious sure, but I think the bisexual thing stems mainly from my long term crush on a girl. But it isn't even a crush. It's just... I'm really protective of her and I like making her happy but I don't want to have sex with her or anything. Maybe it's just sisterly and I'm just not used to having a positive sibling relationship.