I need someone to either tell me it's okay to write real life wish fulfillment stories or tell me I'm weird and that I should stop.

To clarify, my latest, and generally all of them, aren't romance centered, but they do give me a lot of satisfaction in dealing with all kinds of relationships in my life.

My best friend does it too, but we have very different styles. I put myself in mortal danger, or knock me up, or I get raped or apocalypse, you know, awful stuff, and deal with the aftermath and I make sure at least someone is there for me. Hurt/comfort. It's my favourite fanfiction genre. You hurt the characters you love the most (it's called whump), where the character is not at fault for their injuries and are generally more competent than other people give them credit, and then you have other characters realise they are important or just be there for them and it's very touching and okay, there is usually romance at that point but it's a great outline for a story, I love it.

I also generally do the hopeless situation, everything sucks, but still, it generally boils down to hurt/comfort and the even-if-everything-else-is-shit-at-least-I-get-you-out-of-it trope.

So I've started a new one :) They are so much fun. I really am egotistical this way, I love writing about myself. I'm one of my own favourite characters. I don't think I MarySue-ify myself, but I would say it's accurate that I do change things and make them more to my liking, but hey, what else is fiction for?

I feel vaguely up myself writing it. It's super fun, I've just written the easiest 8000 words ever, but writing everybody freaking out cos I might die feels slightly lame. (Fun though).

But it's not like I'm trying to exaggerate, I just am trying to think about it, okay, Mum gets the call at 3am, she gets herself and my brother to the hospital, calls my Dad, he'd drive down straightaway from Newcastle (I'm in a seriously critical condition), calls my Auntie who's a nurse at the hospital to come in... So far I feel like that is what'd happen. It's not that up myself, this is my family, if anyone cares, they have to.

After that, I'll use other real life examples to guide the story. My friend got hit my a car this year, I can use those reactions plus my friends little sister got in an accident on a skateboard and was flown up to Sydney where her condition was so serious (bleeding/swelling in the brain) that they thought she was going to die, so I can use that. Also my bffls little sister who started having hour long seizures and had to go to hospital while in Serbia this year (puberty and autism do not mix). I'm not saying I'd use those conditions, but I'd use the emotions stirred up by them and the way in which the news was spread, word of mouth, facebook, how those closest were told and what they did, and those who have relayed those experiences to me.

I'm not one to deny it when inspiration strikes. Who even knows when the last time I was able to write hopefully 10k in a day? Ages ago. This is fun.
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My two latest are called 'Friends With Benefits' which is pretty self explanatory. Involves lots of arguments, alcohol and conversation. Tries to explore to mainly the concepts of agency and free will. Even if a choice is bad, don't you have a right to still make it? It's pretty fun, I'm not writing it right now, sometimes inspiration just goes, but I'll come back. It's only about 7000 words.

The other is a psychothriller, kidnapped and locked in a room with one person, forced through very real physical, environmental threats, they're forced into very intimate situation, which is filmed for profit. Another in my very long list of fuck-or-die's, one of my best, though I stole the idea. Mainly though, while I write some very dirty things occasionally, mostly I use the concept of sex to inflict more angst and pain, along with intimacy and a shitload of power plays and dubious consent. My stories have messages but more than that, they cover all the right gender and sexuality issues that gets me really going.

The writing is really just my way of harnessing it so I can trigger myself in all the most delightful ways.