73.5! I'm just gonna start each entry with my weight I think, at least for the weightloss/ fitness entries. I lost 400g over night, which is basically a pound. It means I'm on track this month, I want to get below 70 so I needed to lose 4kg this month. Which should be easy enough, I'm already trying to lose a kg a week and this is a 30 day month.
I think the fact that I lost .4kg is due to the fact that Shark Week (half week?) ended, and it was readjusting, plus the fact that I had a really good day yesterday. So I don't have the same expectations for tomorrows weigh in, but you never know, I will be pushing myself quite hard today and if I eat clean maybe I could lose the same again, which would be setting myself up for a really good week, which I need because I know I'm going to put on weight at Easter. Which is 4 days away.
In other news, my annoying best friend got involved with you-know-who and I again, which is irritating because I think forgetting about ever being in questionable circumstances with him is a really good idea. Certainly he gets grumpy when it gets brought up.
Sigh, I'm supposed to do my 30 day shred now but I can't be effed. Apart from swimming today, I haven't done anything. Maybe tomorrow I will do more. I will walk to Fairy Meadow from Uni and maybe walk home after, and definitely do my Shred, but today, my diet just fucked up, because I had early breakfast, late lunch then early dinner. Because I went like 7-8 hours between breakfast and lunch, I was starving and that's why my lunch and dinner didn't feel that good even though I ate a lot. Thankfully I didn't binge, but I feel close to it.
I'm getting a bit 'I miss chocolate, I want it,' but I just need to refocus on my goals, which is the scale, and my strength and will power and my tummy.
You know what, I am going to do my Shred now. Do I want to feel guilty or proud tomorrow? Proud. I want to wake up feeling like I did enough to deserve weight loss and if I stand on the scales and have a bad day, I don't want to have to blame that on myself- on being lazy. And if I do stand on the scales and lose an extra 100g or something, then I will grin like an idiot because I earned it.
My calories are 1050 for the day, that's about par. I try to stay around 1000. I know, 1200 is the limit/goal/ what I should aim for and I sort of do but I don't want to snack when I know it'll adversely affect my weight loss. Well maybe it won't but I'll feel guilty about it anyway. I need a bigger breakfast maybe, or a mid morning snack, so I feel full longer.
I do want to keep continuing on with the no food after dinner rule, not forever but for now. It kinda sucks, because I think about chocolate a lot but I'll feel bad if I have something now, like chocolate milk or something. Especially since I hang around so much on the weightloss tag on Tumblr. It's like, if you've been good, going on there is awesome and you feel good, but if you've binged or had a lazy day, it'll turn on the guilt.
But you know, it's still good. Either way, it's convincing you to be healthy and do the right thing and deter you from bad choices. I mean, I'm not saying it's perfect, I don't want to be shamed for having chocolate or an off day and that's not what it's about, moderation is the key to fitness, but at this point, I just want to go hard, and try to see some results. I don't see them yet, but Mum said she sees tiny differences so yay. My cousin too said I looked a bit more toned.
I mostly just want to get smaller. I feel so big. But I also want to get fitter. I want to not look so gross when sweaty but that's just an extra. But if I get fit, then I can do more without sweating. Though then I'll need to start working out harder... but when I'm just doing something for the sake of doing it, not to burn calories, it would be nice if I didn't turn into a shiny tomato face.
But there are small improvements there as well, I can see it with the 30 day shred, I am slightly better. I don't stop to catch my breath, I just power through it and feel the burn. I'm not saying I go 100 percent on every rep but I am getting closer. Those bicycle crunches... I get to 30 now, not 30 in a row, but like 18 good ones, then I knock out the rest with a mixture of flailing and grunting. Still, I'm happy with that improvement.
My motivation poster is so much better than I thought it would be. SOme of those quotes actually do motivate me. 'Go an extra mile' 'you are closer than yesterday' 'you are lapping the people on the couch' 'it does not matter how slow you go, just as long as you do not stop' 'you gotta fight for it' 'it doesn't matter what you write down, your body keeps perfect records' (for calorie counting) etc etc, they do work, and they do get me through those last 20 seconds of an exercise.
Anyway, it's 10 o clock, I don't know what this lifestyle is doing to me. I am tired early and awake at god awful hours like 6:30am. The heck is up with that? But I'm yawning now, so I will go upstairs, brush my teeth, do 75 sit ups, possibly a plank and then conk out.
Good plan? I think yes.
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