Welcome to 2017!
After New Years, I moved out of home... approximately four doors up the hill and in with my disabled uncle, who conveniently lives in the same apartment as my boyfriend.
Hurray!
So now we live even closer than before, and with a (with limits) open door policy, it's almost like living together, without much of the icky commitment and with our own bedrooms for space. I was pretty ambivalent about the moving thing until I did it. Like, I was sad to move out of home, I like home. It's cheap and much nicer than I can afford myself, and I like Mum and Tom.
However, now that I am out and I have everything set up nicely and I'm settled in, I very much like living where I am. I can still save money while I'm here, I get a step closer to domesticity with the bae and while I don't necessarily get more freedom in terms of having parties and friends over and having loud sex, I do know not have anyone telling me what to do. I have a lot more responsibility for groceries/washing/cleaning etc, but that means I do things the way I want them done, and without Mum around, I can finally learn to eat/cook like a normal person (she can't handle any scent stronger than pepper in the kitchen, let alone onion or garlic or soy sauce). I'm learning to cook, which is exciting and motivating. Bae took me grocery shopping, to get all the basics in bulk. I've never had half the stuff before, but bae is a good cook and he'll help me get all the basic meals down.
Living with John is fine, I just keep to my room when I don't want to interact and he's talkative but not like, coming knocking on my door to talk. When he has seizures, I get a bit unsure, they don't last long but it's always unsettling to have any kind of unexpected yelling and seizure noises. I don't have to do anything, one just happened and I just went out into the living room and was like 'You okay?" and he was like 'yeah' so it's fine, but I feel bad for not doing more, though I don't know what more there is to do. My aunties are around a lot too which is fine. I don't mind if Orion comes out of my bedroom while they are there, it doesn't both anyone. I don't think John minds either.
I have cute fairy lights everywhere in my room, and I culled all my stuff, so everything is quite neat! I was pretty sure I would be neater when I moved out if I could develop the habit from day 1. Like, a new environment that I've never experienced as messy is much less likely to deteriorate because neat is the norm, rather than the exception. So going back to 'neat' is the baseline expectation. At the very least, I'm trying to form better habits and I think new starts are the best time to do it, so #newyearnewhousenewme
I've also started jogging, another new years thing but you know, I'm hopeful and positive about it. I'm starting slow, and not overdoing it. I look forward to it so far, rather than dreading it. I try to conceptualise the run in my head as my time for myself, when I feel really good and something to feel thankful for, rather than curse. I think a lot of my problems just need some old fashioned CBT to really change my perceptions. I'm gonna run 2k tomorrow, as my 7th run for the year, and that's not a lot in terms of distance, but it's not nothing either. I'm pretty unfit but if I keep it up, I'll be running 3k by the end of the month and 5k by early March. It doesn't need to be instant amazing distances, cos if I go slow and get the running mindset right, it could be sustainable through the year. So far, I go every second day at 7am, around the lighthouse and an every increasing distance beyond. Tomorrow I should reach the WEC, after two weeks of doing it. Part of me is like noooo don't talk about it yet, it hasn't been long enough, it's gonna be embarrassing if you stop, and don't actually keep it up, but y'know, putting plans out into the universe is good. It makes me accountable and also I just like talking about the things I'm doing as I do them. Right now, I think this is the time, I think this is me getting the balance right, and it's gonna work. The combo of eating right and exercising is gonna do me good, if it lasts another two weeks, another two months, or six months or all year.
I'm very happy with where I am right now. Getting into good habits with food, fitness and neatness before clin comes into my life and brings with it stress and makes my life hectic. Yay 2k17!
After New Years, I moved out of home... approximately four doors up the hill and in with my disabled uncle, who conveniently lives in the same apartment as my boyfriend.
Hurray!
So now we live even closer than before, and with a (with limits) open door policy, it's almost like living together, without much of the icky commitment and with our own bedrooms for space. I was pretty ambivalent about the moving thing until I did it. Like, I was sad to move out of home, I like home. It's cheap and much nicer than I can afford myself, and I like Mum and Tom.
However, now that I am out and I have everything set up nicely and I'm settled in, I very much like living where I am. I can still save money while I'm here, I get a step closer to domesticity with the bae and while I don't necessarily get more freedom in terms of having parties and friends over and having loud sex, I do know not have anyone telling me what to do. I have a lot more responsibility for groceries/washing/cleaning etc, but that means I do things the way I want them done, and without Mum around, I can finally learn to eat/cook like a normal person (she can't handle any scent stronger than pepper in the kitchen, let alone onion or garlic or soy sauce). I'm learning to cook, which is exciting and motivating. Bae took me grocery shopping, to get all the basics in bulk. I've never had half the stuff before, but bae is a good cook and he'll help me get all the basic meals down.
Living with John is fine, I just keep to my room when I don't want to interact and he's talkative but not like, coming knocking on my door to talk. When he has seizures, I get a bit unsure, they don't last long but it's always unsettling to have any kind of unexpected yelling and seizure noises. I don't have to do anything, one just happened and I just went out into the living room and was like 'You okay?" and he was like 'yeah' so it's fine, but I feel bad for not doing more, though I don't know what more there is to do. My aunties are around a lot too which is fine. I don't mind if Orion comes out of my bedroom while they are there, it doesn't both anyone. I don't think John minds either.
I have cute fairy lights everywhere in my room, and I culled all my stuff, so everything is quite neat! I was pretty sure I would be neater when I moved out if I could develop the habit from day 1. Like, a new environment that I've never experienced as messy is much less likely to deteriorate because neat is the norm, rather than the exception. So going back to 'neat' is the baseline expectation. At the very least, I'm trying to form better habits and I think new starts are the best time to do it, so #newyearnewhousenewme
I've also started jogging, another new years thing but you know, I'm hopeful and positive about it. I'm starting slow, and not overdoing it. I look forward to it so far, rather than dreading it. I try to conceptualise the run in my head as my time for myself, when I feel really good and something to feel thankful for, rather than curse. I think a lot of my problems just need some old fashioned CBT to really change my perceptions. I'm gonna run 2k tomorrow, as my 7th run for the year, and that's not a lot in terms of distance, but it's not nothing either. I'm pretty unfit but if I keep it up, I'll be running 3k by the end of the month and 5k by early March. It doesn't need to be instant amazing distances, cos if I go slow and get the running mindset right, it could be sustainable through the year. So far, I go every second day at 7am, around the lighthouse and an every increasing distance beyond. Tomorrow I should reach the WEC, after two weeks of doing it. Part of me is like noooo don't talk about it yet, it hasn't been long enough, it's gonna be embarrassing if you stop, and don't actually keep it up, but y'know, putting plans out into the universe is good. It makes me accountable and also I just like talking about the things I'm doing as I do them. Right now, I think this is the time, I think this is me getting the balance right, and it's gonna work. The combo of eating right and exercising is gonna do me good, if it lasts another two weeks, another two months, or six months or all year.
I'm very happy with where I am right now. Getting into good habits with food, fitness and neatness before clin comes into my life and brings with it stress and makes my life hectic. Yay 2k17!
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